Feeling superbly DOWN. Sulking most of the time lately.. Why!!?
But I know I need to rely on God.. relying relying.. tough..
Dajie told me let go and let God.. I laughed in my heart, I knew this but I cant do it.. But indeed I need to keep letting go.. AND I really appreciate your guidance, dajie.. thanks alot dajie.
Sorry to many who saw my sulky face lately.. I promise Daniel will cheer up "soon".
Keep praying with me k?
Why down? Simply because..
I miss my family - I've been staying in hostel all by myself - LONELY!!! I just feel like hugging my mum, tell her I'm feeling damn awful inside and have a good cry in her arms right now... sob sob... *tears in my eyes*
I miss brother badly..
I miss cycling..
I miss the beach..
I miss the sunshine..
I am a BIG attention seeker.. I need attention..
I am very very visually distracted lately..
I was disappointed with some people's behaviour..
I was disturbed by some issues..
I am not doing my door of hope..
I am so TIRED... busy with projects, translations, assignments and so many deadlines to meet..
I really feel like hugging someone..
I need security, I need comfort, I need someone whom I could rely on for a while.. before I move on again.. I really feel like having someone hugging me.. I really want a PHYSICAL person.. made of flesh and blood... to hug..
BUT where to find? Sian...
Feel like watching BBM.. Maybe tomorrow... Maybe maybe..
Signed off.. Danielgoh
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2 comments:
brother daniel, thank you for expressing your heart's cry. reading it, in my heart, I immediately started sending hugs to you.
i've been thinking of times i spent in Zambia and Ecuador and how much freer the men were to be affectionate with each other. They held hands, sat close, put their arms around each other. They were not lovers, just friends and it was normal.
Sadly in "westernized" countries, we don't get the touch we need, the hugs, the physical closeness that even Jesus and the disciples enjoyed.
Not all longings are sinful. sometimes our longings do not fit in with our society and then seem sinful because they look different from what other people seem to need.
I hear your struggle. The days filled with frowns. No need to cover that up with a "Christian happy mask". Jesus longs to fellowship in our sufferings.
Prayers and love and cyber hugs,
peterson
Thanks alot alot alot brother!!
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