Daniel needs to pray hard hard
Cos something is stuck in my heart heart..
It has been a very very terrible day for me. Flashbacks, temptations, visual attractions, you named, I experienced it.. What's more, I succumbed to temptations.. haiz..
When can I get out of this shit?
The revelation I received when I woke up - Look beyond the circumstances.
Focus on God and He will heal me, He will save me, He will deliver me..
I fell on my knees to pray, and I need to pray even more.
Because only God alone healeth me.
Prayer
Abba Father,
Forgive me for what I've done that blemished against You Holy Name but Lord Father, I walk with You again. Help me Father, I am weak but You are strong. You deliver me from the evil one with Your Right Hand.
Abba Father, enable me to count my blessings and most importantly, rely on Thy Strength day by day. I am worthless but for Your grace, love and mercy.
Lord Jesus, sorry for the wounds inflicted on You once again. I plead that Lord, You continue to teach me Your way. Hold my hands, don't let me fall down again. Heal me Lord. Heal me.
Holy Spirit, fall fresh upon me now Lord. I need You Lord, every moment in my life. Teach me, counsel me, comfort me and heal me O Lord. You are able.
In the Name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit, I seek forgiveness, cleansing and I pray for deliverance. Amen.
Brothers and Sisters, temptations are abound. But behold, He has overcome this world and you know what, I am going to be of good cheer once again. I will continue to walk in the way of the Lord.
To God be all Glory and Praise =)
1 comment:
Daniel, your post brings back so many memories for me. I have over 25 journals that chronicle my struggles over temptation and my MANY MANY failures to resist.
Reading over them recently, it seemed like the same entry over and over. They are filled with so much shame, remorse and a tenacity to get up and try again and again. I often worried, maybe I am not truly repentent, I have not repented from the heart and would beg Jesus to give me a broken heart over my sin.
I tried to figure out, "what is it that you TRULY need and are running to the flesh to attempt to satisfy?" I felt so bad, so dirty, so wrong, so lost, so flawed. Although my spiritual brothers and sisters also suffered with temptations, mine always seem the worse kind, worse than the other sorts of sins people confessed.
Like Paul in Romans 7 I did the very thing that I didn't want to do and it felt like death was at work in my body. Oh wretched man that I am!
It is a killer battle, this battle to contain and subdue desire especially with the load of shame that I often felt towards myself, the feeling of being so terribly flawed. Plus all the fears that the world and the devil had set many traps for me that my flesh would love to find.
So many journal entries the same year after year until finally I realized I was fighting the wrong battle. Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ
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